A manifesto of enoughness

In my online wanderings the other day, I came across a website called Stratejoy. It appears to be part life coach/motivational whatever, part blogging community for women who are striving to bring more joy into their lives. At any rate, there was a blog entry about being enough. I am too lazy to find it again but tonight, I have been battling feeling not-enough all night, and so I thought to myself, this is the time to remind myself of all the things about me that make me uniquely me, and special, and enough.

I am enough.

I have a heart that only wants to please people - to please everybody. I am generous and kind and sensitive, even when I don't show it. I want to make people laugh and I want to take care of them.

I am enough.

I am good at crossword puzzles, and I am impossible to keep down for long. I try to learn from my mistakes even when it's a hard lesson. I work really, really hard, no matter what I am asked to do, because I want to be proud of what I've done at the end of the day. I will never ask anyone to do something I wouldn't do myself.

I am enough.

I think a lot, and I want to understand myself and my motivations - and I want to understand yours, too. I will bend over backwards to believe the best of people even when all evidence says I shouldn't, because that's what I'd want people to do for me.

I am enough.

I have horrible taste in music and reality TV. The only things I can cook are casseroles and soups. I'm a nerd who carries a book everywhere she goes, and I never use a bookmark so it always takes me a minute to figure out what page I am on. I love children's books and fairy tales, and I think we could all learn a little something from Alice in Wonderland and Peter Pan.

I am enough.

When I love, I love fiercely, and I will hang onto that love long past its expiration. I don't like losing people and I don't like giving up on people, even when they've given up on me. And even after I have moved on, I don't forget and I still have love and I'd still do anything somebody I once loved needed. I guess that's just called loyalty. I can't stand seeing people cry because it makes me feel helpless to fix it. I don't have much of a temper and I hate to fight. I am a textbook Libra and I prize fairness. If you are being wrong, I will probably tell you, and I expect you to tell me when I am, and I won't take offense. I'll probably still cry after you leave, but not because I'm offended. Because I'm afraid I've disappointed you.

I am enough.

I am impulsive sometimes and heedless of consequences sometimes, and other times I can't make a decision to save my life - and that's okay. Sometimes I wish I were better at communicating, but it just takes me awhile to figure out exactly how I feel and I don't want to say anything I can't take back in the heat of the moment. I want to be careful of people's hearts. Raised voices and angry words make me feel like a child, but I am learning to be more assertive. I am a work in progress.

I am enough.

There are going to be people who do not like me. There are going to be people who do not think I am enough. This hurts, but it is okay too, because I know that I have value and I am doing the best that I can. And that is enough for me.